8 Years and counting...

Hello to all, Today is our 8th anniversary. We made it through the 7 year itch without scratching. Kari and I have been looking though pictures while the kids are at my parents. Here are some highlights from the big day. We were married at St. Patrick Church in Lake Forest, took pictures at the Chicago Botanical Gardens and had our reception at the Glen Club in Glenview. Enjoy!

More James and his Flat Stanley..

James took his Flat Stanley to Art School today. Here's the picture...

Katie Being Cute, Part 3...

Last one for tonight. Kari gave Katie a Graham cracker for a snack this afternoon. After a little nibbling, Katie presented what she made to Kari and exclaimed "I made stairs with my cracker". Check it out...

Katie Being Cute Part 2...

Okay... I really have no explanation for this one. Jay

James and Flat Stanley...

James and his class over the summer are doing a Flat Stanley project. Click here to learn more about Flat Stanley and his adventures. We had a fair number of adventures as a family this weekend, including a trip to Rantoul, IL and lunch at a Cracker Barrel. That is my favorite road trip food. Check out some pictures from where James' Flat Stanley has been. Jay

Katie Being Cute Part 1...

Okay... Here's Katie showing off her maternal instincts, rocking her baby and singing Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Stat to her. Just ignore the part where she drops her baby. Jay

James the Camera Man

Here are some pictures that James took with my camera. The neighbors got a new deck on their 4th floor, which required a crane to lift the wood up and James wanted to take a picture of it all. Here is his pictures!

 
 

Katie runnning!

pretty girl!

likes to take pictures of nature just like daddy...

Katerina Ballerina

My sister in law Audrey's sister Vanessa bought Katie this very cute tutu.  Katie likes to put it on and dance around like a ballernia.  Mama Diane has dubbed her Katerina Ballerina and now if you ask her waht her name is, she says, "I'm Katerina Ballerina." 

This is a picture of Katie that I couldn't resist taking as she put on her sparkle shoes and her sunglasses and wanted to go outside to play.  I couldn't resist taking a picture of this adorable girl!   

More Pictures- James' first day of summer school

James had his first day of summer school two weeks ago.  Mama Diane and Papa Bede gave him a present to start the summer off on the "right foot."  Here he is closing his eyes while he waits for his surprise...

oohh.... shoes!

I think these new crocs will do!  Thanks Mama Diane and Papa Bede!

Catching up with Pictures- Baking Cookies with Mama Diane

James and Katie did some cookie baking with Mama Diane (or Mama Dinah as Katie calls her) at our house recently.  Here are some pictures of it.

James taking the cookies off the cookie sheet.

Katie swiping a cookie when no one is looking...

As Katie says "nummy!"

life...

Some birds have decided to start their family in our window boxes located off our kitchen balcony on the second floor of our townhouse. (Makes me giggle as there is a huge rooftop deck off the fourth floor of our townhouse and if she just would have flown up two more stories she would have found many more planters to make a nest in) You know you are in quite an urban area when a bird decides a window box off a kitchen is a great place to make a nest and lay eggs. It appears it is a morning dove and it has not moved from the nest for the past week. It has been rained on, blown around, put up with kids tapping on the glass, I even watered the flowers around her and she didn't move. I wonder what will happen the next time we grill.... the heat may scare it off for a bit. We'll see. Not that we are doing much grilling. You can't see her in the picture, as she is pretty buried in the marigolds.

The kids are having a ball watching the bird. Every morning it's a "new discovery" for Katie. She walks in the kitchen, looks out the window, sees the bird and says "look mommy! a bird!" and I say "where?" and she says "right there, in the flowers!" It's hilarious. And loud, as she literally uses her high "c" voice to say it. Today the daddy bird showed up for the first time (I'll let you insert your own absentee dad joke here) and stood guard for a few minutes while the kids and I were eating dinner. James said, "You better take a picture mom, we don't know when the dad will come back again." (Again, insert your own joke here). So, we did. Here is a picture of the dad above, and below is a picture of Katie, on her chair, watching the bird.

I'm hoping that this does not provoke many questions about babies from James, but if you know James, you kow this probably will.  He hasn't asked any questions yet, but I feel, or rather fear, it's only a matter of time until I hear some questions that I might not want to answer.  Maybe I'll distract him with some candy when he asks... that usually works!

On a personal note, I had a nice time last night at the Party for a Purpose.  I was touched by all that showed up and ordered online.  I am paying for a night out last night today though, as I am just exhausted.  Luckily, a friend of James had him over for a playdate today, and that allowed me to rest somewhat.  Today Katie decided she was not napping and there was nothing I could do about it.  I think she figured out that since I can't pick her up, if I ask her to come with me, and she doesn't want to, she just doesn't.  And what am I going to do about it?!?!?  I know, bribe her with candy right?  Well, I already used that to get her in the house after we played outside, and then after lunch, and there is only so much candy I'm willing to give her.  Nice parenting moment huh? Won't win me mom of the year but I have a feeling I am going to have to be pretty creative this year. 

I am looking forward to tomorrow, as we are traveling downstate to attend my cousin's wedding.  I will get to see all my family and see my cousin be the most beautiful bride!  My sister in law Tracy is coming with us to the church to help with the kids and then she is taking the kids back to her house to spend the night.  It will be a wonderful event! 

I need to get some pictures posted soon!  There are pictures from father's day, lake geneva and probably a few other events on Jay's camera, so sorry for a delay in the pictures of recent events.  I'll get them posted soon.   

Tonight....

I am looking forward to seeing so many friends tonight at the Party for a Purpose. I am so touched by the evening that my friends Alex, Nicole and Sue are planning in my honor. I have to say, that I am a little nervous, as I have never been on the receiving end of one of these fundraisers- usually I am the one planning them! It is going to be hard to just show up and enjoy myself. I am so touched by everyone's support. Here are the party details if you want to join us tonight...

You can click on the invite to make it bigger!

testing update....

Test results showed cancer has not spread anywhere else! thank GOD! Off to Lake Geneva for the weekend with Jay. First chemo treatment scheduled for July 13th. Thank you all for your continued prayers!!!!  Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there!

Pink Warrior

This afternoon I have three appointments, one of which is with my oncologist.  Yesterday I had a PET scan and I will find out the results at today's apppointment.  I am praying they don't find it anywhere else.  I will also make a treatment plan today.  I will have a start date, and a plan of action and I WILL FIGHT and FIGHT HARD.  I will be a pink warrior and I need all of you to be in my army. 

Those of you that know me well, know I have always been a supporter of breast cancer research.  My checks are the pink ribbon checks, when I got married, our rsvp envelope stamps were the stamping out breast cancer stamps, I have walked the mother's day walk in Chicago, I have planned fundraisers for those battling breast cancer, I have donated money to breast cancer research, worn Ford pink warrior apparel for years, sponsered many walk for the cure participants and more.  I have done all this for two reasons: first the need for this to stop affecting so many families and the second, more importantly, to honor my grandmother.  My grandmother had breast cancer at 27 years old, she fought back with a radical mastectomy (in the 50's nonetheless) and 6 months of daily radiation.  She fought and gave up things that changed her life forever.  But she won! She is one of the most wonderful and important people in my life.  Growing up, her and I spent a lot of time together.  She was the most wonderful person and took me and my brother on the most wonderful outings.  Everything she did she did with love and enjoyment.  From making us hot chocolate in bed, planting her flowers, or taking us to the beach, she enjoyed every minute of life.  She taught me so many things, but the biggest is to enjoy life, and enjoy your family and friends and what is around you.  She indulged us, cherished us, taught us, but never coddled us.  She pushed us to do things we didn't want to do, encouraged us to play nicely when we weren't, and took the time to explain why we should or shouldn't be doing what we were currently doing. 

I didn't even know that my grandmother had breast cancer until I was almost a teenager.  When I look back at that now, I realize that she overcame something terrible, but she didn't let it define her.  Yes, it changed her life, yes, it made things she wanted in her life never able to occur, but she didn't stop living.  She fought, she won, and she moved on, but with a zest of life that she probably didn't have before.  The woman waterskiied, swam, rollerskated, played with her daughter and grandchildren in the park. Attended every milestone and everyday occasion of her daughters and grandchildren.  I watched her ride on my brother's go-kart and the back of his motorcycle, and I think there may have even be a ride on his jetski too.   She traveled, she had a wonderful, loving marriage, she worked, she volunteered, she cooked wonderful meals, she took time to read books, and when she was 72, she got breast cancer again.  She fought back again and again, came out on top.  The second time, I was scared, she was my wonderful grandmother, someone I couldn't imagine not having in my life, I sat in the waiting room while she had her second mastectomy, and I sat in her room after her surgery.  I think back to walking in that room, seeing her sitting up and asking for food.  She was hungry! I kept flashing back to that while I was in my recovery room, sick as a dog and in so much pain.  My grandmother is strong, and I am too.  She gave me that in the lessons she taught me in her daily words and actions, she got through this, and I will too.  I will fight, I will win and I won't let this define me. 

When I was first diagnosed I said to Jay, "I just want to raise my babies, take them to the park, take them swimming, feed them lunch and do the normal things mommies do with thier babies."  I realize now, no, I don't want to JUST do the normal things, I want to do the abnormal things too.  I want to teach them to take a chance, I don't take too many chances in life, but I think that will change now.  I want to teach them what a gift this life is, what good things God has given them, and to enjoy every minute of it and give back.  I want to continue giving back to my community, volunteering, helping, coordinating, paying it forward.  And I will.  I will just be delaying that for a year while I fight, and then I will be back, better than ever!

Next Steps...

Hello All, I finally have a few quiet minutes to type out a few updates. Kari's parents went home last night to catch up on things on their own for the weekend. Kari had a sample sale in Elmhurst this morning and her friend Alex took her out there to help. It was a long day for her but it was an excuse to get out of the house that didn't involve a trip to Loyola. Katie and I went on a walk this morning to the health club. I dropped her off at the kids' center and got in a good run followed by a nice walk home in a light rain. James came home this afternoon. We really missed him and it is good to have the whole family together. It seems like he grew a foot since he left last week. He has been very careful and cautious with Kari. He is hugging her gently. Kari had her follow up appointments this week. In general, she is healing well. Unfortunately, the news that we were given yesterday wasn't what we had hoped. We met with Dr. Godellas first. He told us two things that we didn't expect. First, they found DCIS in Kari's left breast tissue. This is ductal carcinoma, in-situ. It is similar to what she had on the right. The main difference is that the tumors that she had on the right side was invasive and had to spread to her sentinel lymph node. What they found in the left was in-situ, which means that it isn't spreading, but it is still cancer. This was unexpected because they told us that the left breast was clear based on the results from the mammograms and the ultrasounds. Kari certainly made a good decision by having a bi-lateral mastectomy. The second piece of information is that they found cancer in 9 of the 18 lymph nodes that they removed during her surgery. Both of these came as a shock to all of us. I think that we were all expecting to get a confirmation that the cancer was contained in the right breast and that the left was clear. I also think that we had all convinced ourselves that the pathology would show a few affected lymph nodes. Nine was far more than I would have expected. After Dr. Godellas, we met with Dr. Albain, Kari’s oncologist to talk about treatment. She has to recover from surgery before anything happens, which should be 4 to 6 weeks. From there, she will have 4 to 6 months of chemotherapy. We have a few options of different clinical trials that we may want to participate in. There is a stack of papers sitting here on my desk that we need to review. Because of the new findings, radiation is almost certainly in the treatment regimen. We were hoping that Kari would be able to avoid this. Dr. Albain said that we would talk about the details of radiation therapy at a later date. We need to focus on getting Kari healed and healthy for the next round. There are a few additional things that they are going to try to bolt on to Kari’s therapy. First, all of the tumors have shown to be highly receptive to estrogen. They are going to do everything that they can to get her body to stop producing estrogen. Secondly, the US FDA is close to approving biphosphonate as an additional treatment for breast cancer. This is an osteoporosis drug that has been approved in Europe and has shown to increase her chances of beating this. Kari has another appointment with the oncologist next Friday. Before then, she needs to get a heart scan to make sure that she is eligible to participate in one of the clinical trials. Also, they have scheduled her for a PET scan. They did bone scans, MRI’s and CT scans in early May to see if the cancer had spread anywhere else in her body. The results from these tests were all clear, including her left breast. In light of the pathology after surgery, they want to take another look just to make sure. The PET scan (positron emission tomography) looks at how cells absorb sugar in the body. They will give Kari a sugar solution with a radioactive tracer in it. The scan picks up parts of the body where cells are aggressively consuming the sugar. Cancer cells are the greediest ones out there and they show up clearly on this scan. I think what upset us the most after the appointment on Friday was the odds that Dr. Albain laid out for us. You can take a glass is half-full or half-empty approach to this. Either way, they are scary and I know that Kari is really bothered by this. I am very optimistic about this and I think that Kari has a lot of things going in her favor. She made the right choice with the bi-lateral mastectomy. They are going to aggressively treat this. The potential supplemental treatments including hormone suppression and biphosphonate improve her odds. She also has the advantage of being treated by some of the global experts on breast cancer and its treatment. We are very fortunate to have the resources of Loyola so close. Most importantly, she knows that she has the love and support of a big group of people. This will make all of the difference for her. That is what we know for now. Thank you again for all of the cheering, support, thoughts and prayers. We’ll let you know what happens next week.

Party with a Purpose

My very good friend and neighbor Alex is hosting a "party with a purpose" at her home benefiting my fight against breast cancer.  The vendors, Sue Johnson an arbonne consultant, and Nicole Simonds a Stella & Dot stylist, will be donating their proceeds to my Team4Harris bank account to cover medical and childcare expenses. I am touched by their generosity.  I will be attending and would love if you would just stop by, even to just say hi!
*CLICK ON THE IMAGE TO VIEW THE INVITE LARGER*

awake, finally!

Hi everyone, it's Kari.  I am rather weak and tired, but wanted to post something.  I cannot believe Memorial Day was only last weekend- it feels like an eternity ago.  Monday night and Tuesday night were restless nights.  The study drug gave me a terrible sore throat, and that coupled with the anxiety of the upcoming surgery just wouldn't let me sleep.  I went to church on Tuesday morning with the kids and met with Father Carl, who prayed with me and I received annointing of the sick.  James played on the floor in the room and Katie sat on the chair next to me.  As we were praying I looked over at Katie and she was sitting with her hands folded in prayer, head bent and muttering.  I swear she was praying with us.  I went to my pre-op testing appointment on Tuesday afternoon and then got my sugery time 6:30am.  6:30 came bright and early, and with a lot of emotion.  I had a hard time getting ready on Wednesday morning, and half of it was I really wanted to kiss my babies before surgery, but since it was so early in the morning, we had to take them to my mother in law's the night before.  Jay was really sweet and made things better by showing me some pictures and playing some voice recordings James had made on our iphones.  Who knew trying to occupy James by letting him play with my iphone would turn out to be so comforting to me?!? We got to the hospital and checked in, and Jay stayed with me until they had to take me to pre-op.  My parents arrived about 7:30 and they got to spend time with me beforehand as well.  My surgeon and plastic surgeon came in before the surgery to see me, and that was reassuring.  It also felt good to know that I had so many people praying for me.  The last thing I remember was being rolled into a really big room with a lot of people and supplies waiting for me....

I kept thinking when I couldn't sleep the night before about the Chicago Marathon.  For the last few years my brother Rob, my brother in law Greg and sister in law Tracy and Jay have run in it.  I remember on those mornings waking up and thinking it's 7:30 and they are starting, it's 8:30 and they are still running, it's 9:30 and they are still running, it's 10:30 and their still running.  I thought of all the things I was doing, all while they were running for hours.  I felt like my surgery was like the Chicago Marathon and I kind of felt like I was more concerned for everyone who was waiting for my surgery to be over than for me.  I had the easy part, I just had to sleep.  I felt bad for all the people waiting to hear news.  I am thankful that Jay and my parents were in the waiting room fielding updates for the surgical team, and I am thankful for my Aunt Rosemary, Uncle Paul, Aunt Nancy and Sue for spending the day with them.  I know that it was comforting to them to have those people there.  I am also thankful to my mother in law and father in law for watching James and Katie during my surgery. 

After I came out of surgery, I don't remember much except feeling pain and then feeling sick.  I waffled between feeling pain, getting medication, getting sick, feeling pain, trying a new medication, feeling sick, etc.  The cycle lasted Wed night, all day Thursday night and until about 2pm on Friday when I finally gave up and just decided to take tylenol and deal with the rest of the pain rather than keep throwing up.  Because if any of you know me well, you know what a baby I am when it comes to being sick.  I am so grateful that my mom was there with me the entire time, sleeping on a little couch, freezing right under the cold air conditioning vent.  I was touched by all the visitors, phone calls, flowers and cards I received.  I am also thankful for my dad who stayed at my house on from Wed night to Friday night to be with my kids.  I am so glad they had their Papa Bede to play with and take care of them, as they love their Papa Bede very much and he is very good with them! 

I came home on Friday night about 8pm, and it was nice to be in my own bed and see my Katie sleeping.  I miss James, but I am sure he is having a great time with his cousins.  I am so grateful that my brother in law Greg took him downstate on Friday to my other brother and law and sister in law, Tracy and Chuck's house for the week.  He will have a great time with his cousins! 

Since I have been home, I have been resting, sleeping, watching tv, and listening to books on tape.  Thank goodness for my iphone so I could read some emails and today I am feeling good enough to spend a little time on my laptop. Yesterday my brother Rob and his wife Audrey come over with their twin girls Caroline and Olivia and they played with Katie and took all the girls for a walk.  Thank you Krupa Family of 4!   I also had a nice visit with my Aunt Aggie, Uncle Richard and cousin Meridith who stopped by today. 

My mom is going to be staying with us for at least a week.  It is so nice to have my mom, an RN with me 24/7.  My dad is  helping out too, and it is so nice to have them taking care of me and Katie. 

I am looking forward to feeling better and stronger each day.  Next week I have three appointments with the doctors to figure out the next steps and chart a plan of action.  I know I will have two more surgeries before this journey is over, and some sort of treatment.  I am thankful for all my friends and family, and my doctors.  Keep praying please!

Kari's Home...

Well, we brought Kari home today. I am writing this from the tropical oasis that our kitchen has become. Kari has received a flood of flowers from everyone. She really appreciates this. She didn't sleep well last night and she was very nauseous for the first part of today. She did a complete turn around when I got there about 2:00. I'd like to think that it was my bright wit and charm, but more likely it was because they changed her meds again. They took her off of the NORCO and put her on plain Tylenol to take the edge off of the pain. The difference was night and day. By the time dinner came around, she had a modest appetite. Kari is propped up in bed with pillows and the TV remote. We got home after Katie went to bed. They will both be very happy to see each other in the morning. James and my brother Greg went on an adventure this morning. They caught a train bright & early to Union Station to catch the Amtrak to Rantoul, IL to see his cousins Caleb and Eli. Tracy & Chuck were gracious enough to take James for the upcoming week to allow Kari to rest and heal. It will be tough for him to be away but he's having a good time with his cousins. I am pretty certain that he is having too much fun to be missing us. Thanks again to all for your continued support. It is good to have Kari home and I know that she will be more comfortable here. As a good friend of Kari texted, "Round 1 goes to Team Harris". Let the healing begin. Jay

Update...

Okay Folks, I am sitting on the couch in Kari's room at Loyola. She has been napping for about an hour. Things are going well. She had a decent night. She was pretty nauseous but they changed her pain meds and she is feeling much better. Her pain is under control, obviously enough to let her nap soundly. Her mom went back to our house to clean up, rest a little and spend some time with the kids. I'll stay here for a while. The kids are doing well. They had a busy day with my mom which included going to the zoo and playing at the park. I picked them up about 7:30 last night and James was sound asleep before we crossed over 22nd Street. Katie was a different story. Our usually easy-to-sleep little girl was ready to party last night. When I left the room after I put her down for the first time, she was chatting with one of her stuffed animals. Collectively between Kari's dad and me, we put her to bed 4 times after finding her playing with toys in the dark. Not unhappy, just playing in the dark. I put her down for the final time a little before 10:00. When I checked on the kids again at 11:30, I found her asleep next to James in his bed. Anyway... I'll post more later today. Jay

Email from last night...

Hello All, For those who didn't receive it, here is the text from the email that I sent out last night. Jay Before I get too far, I need to thank all of you on behalf of Kari and our entire family. We have struggled to find the right words to describe the support that Kari has received since we announced her fight with cancer. Surprised, overwhelmed and humbled are a few that come to mind. Your collective thoughts, prayers, cards, phone calls, flowers and visits have made this far easier for Kari. Also, the meals and care for our children have been invaluable. Today was the next big step for Kari. She had a pretty grueling day of surgery that started about 6:30 this morning and ended late in the afternoon. The medical staff at Loyola was caring, professional and compassionate. By their accounts, everything went flawlessly. Kari had a bilateral mastectomy. Additionally, they removed a mass of lymph nodes in her right arm. Right now, she is in a fair amount of pain and nauseous, but doing well considering everything. They are going to watch her closely tonight and into tomorrow. There is a chance that they may release her tomorrow afternoon but we are in no hurry. Friday is the more likely case. Her mom, Diane, will spend tonight with her in the hospital to keep an eye on things. She has 4 to 6 weeks of recovery ahead of her. Over this time, she will be restricted in what she can do, including holding the kids. I know that this will be very difficult for her. We will meet with her oncologist within the next week to chart her course of treatment. It will almost certainly include 4 to 6 weeks of chemotherapy. There is a modest chance of radiation therapy, but we won't know this for sure until we meet with the oncologist. Again, thanks to all who called, texted, emailed today cheering her on and looking for updates. I did my best to keep you all up to date with the play-by-play coverage. Also, thanks to those who spent the day with us in the hospital helping us pass the time and lending your support. Having you there meant a lot to us. Please watch our blog for updates over the next few weeks. You can get to it at www.team4harris.blogspot.com. As we promised, we have been trying to keep just as many updates on the kids on the blog as we have updates on Kari. Sincerely, Kari, Jay, James & Katie The Harris Family

Half-way there...

We just met with Dr. Godellas, Kari's surgeon. His part is finished. He said that she was in good spirits as they were putting her under and that her vitals were strong. He was able to remove all of the tissue that they needed and that there were no other complications. The plastic surgeon is with her now. Dr. Godellas felt that Dr. Vandevender had a good 3 to 4 hours of work to do with her. I'll send out another update when she's in recovery. Jay

Start of a long day...

Good Morning to All, Kari just went into the operating room. We got here about 6:15, went throught he pre-op routine and did a little waiting. Kari's parents got here a little after 7:00. We had about an hour to wait together before they took her off. I'll keep updating this over the course of the day. Jay

surgery

Hi all,  Unless anything changes, my surgery is set for tomorrow morning.  I am first case so I have to be at the hospital bright and early at 6:30.  Jay will update the site with info throughout the day.  Please say prayers for me, my family and all the wonderful people that are taking care of me and my family.  Thank you!